We interviewed a well-known erotic performer, known for her S and M and bondage films. She says she loves all aspects of porn and doesn’t see how people think consensual sex objectifies women and wants everyone to feel they can use porn to explore and learn about themselves.
I am a woman and I love porn, I love to watch it and I love to make it. I think porn is a great way to explore the human sexuality and psychology – and its also great fun.
I would say I’ve always been a fairly sexual person, from around age 13 I begun exploring the vast pleasures of sex, getting to know my body, wanking regularly, and later on fumbling around with over-excited boys. However, in the last few years that I’ve been working in porn I’ve discovered more about myself sexually, and how my mind and personality operate in general -than I have in my entire life. This is why I am such an advocate of porn and I wish people would be more open to watching and talking about it. Of course I understand that pornography is not everyone’s thing – perhaps you don’t get off watching other people act out your fantasy, but if this is the case, I believe you’re in the minority, and most people only say they don’t enjoy porn because it is frowned upon by polite society and seen as disgusting by shallow-minded, insecure people who are to scared to confront their own sexual desires. For those like me, who are open enough to explore their fantasies, watching pornography can be very liberating; I think everyone should try it once.
There are those that say that porn is harmful to society, that it objectifies women, and gives males false ideals of how women should be. I find this all a bit ridiculous.
For starters I don’t think porn objectifies women at all, rather it liberates them. A female porn star has consented to the objectification and chosen to submissive for this role and through this choice they are taking control of their sexuality and acting as a powerful and dominant person. A lot of women love to objectified – consensually – in a way that satisfies their sexual fantasies. What is often forgotten is that the women in porn are actresses who consent to this objectification, if it weren’t it would be rape or torture and illegal, but it’s not. There is something about pornography that often suspends a persons sense of reality causing them to forget that the woman being dominated it is acting. I think this relates to the myth that women don’t enjoy sex as much as men and that they don’t have sexual fantasies, like being dominated. Which are all untrue. Finding porn where a male plays the submissive role is easy, yet no one worries about the objectification of men.
Then there is this idea that porn gives men false expectations of women, that all porn actresses are slutty blondes with fake boobs, and this pressures women to look or act like that. This is ridiculous. Sure, porn actresses don’t reflect the reality of the average woman, but porn isn’t reality, it is fantasy. Men and women don’t watch porn to construct an ideal of how their real partner should look or act; they’re watching it for entertainment and pleasure. If you think that pornography gives people false expectations, we might as well ban rom-com movies since they give women the fantasy that they will one day be swept off their feet and be kissed in the rain by some impossibly handsome man.
I also think its offensive to say that these slutty women don’t exist. I am one of them. I’m slutty. I love cock and love giving blowjobs. Apparently I’m a silly caricature because of what I find sexually pleasing. Also the ‘slutty blond’ actress is only featured in the minority of porn, if a guy is into black women, fat women or even lady-boys he can easily find that type of pornography. There are many more depictions of women than the ones people talk about.
That is the great thing about porn, like music there is something out there for everyone and people ought to have the freedom to find it and explore it without feeling ashamed. Society should be more accepting of porn and realise that it is an artistic performance. It’s a strenuous job both physically and emotionally and I always strive for a good performance in my work. People should appreciate that more. But most of all, everyone should get out there, together or alone, and start truly discovering their body and mind’s desires through porn, after all it’s just a bit of good, unclean, fun.
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